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The Moron's of Judge Judy
Sophie Powles – Emmerdale – She Can’t Even Act as a Spaced Out Druggie!

Ok, maybe I am giving too much away about my past-time activities – but I do like watching Emmerdale. I was hooked after my English girlfriend insisted turning it on during dinner. Sigh – is there any hope for me?

So that said, I am quite passionately impressed with the casting of this show and the high level of acting abilities the cast has. For example, look at the actor Danny Miller who plays Aaron Livesy – fantastic from the word go! I mean most new and virtually inexperienced actors tend to need a while to ‘form’ into their character, whereas Danny was perfect from day one. Completely brilliant!

So my question is – what the hell were they on when they selected Sophie Powles to play Holly Barton? This monotone expressionless bint is so painful to watch!

Watch the video above and I’m sure you will agree! (You will have to fast forward 10 seconds!)

Sophie Powles is a Yip Yip

Urgh! See – how painful was that?! Torture even! That part when they were checking out Nathan – (0:53) – so bad!!!! She didn’t even look at him, just spun her head back and forth! I was surprised that she didn’t turn around and go ‘Yip yip yip yip’ like the Yip Yip’s from Sesame Street! (Don’t know the Yip Yip’s? Click here. Very funny!)

Maybe I am thinking about it too much but it just annoys me that much! At the moment her role is changing from a ‘sweet’ farming girl to an edgy drug addict which really should be relatively easy to act. I mean either you’re stoned and off your face (very easy), or you’re twitchy and paranoid (quite easy) – even I could do that! But she can’t! I’m sure the producers decided after listening to public opinion about her and thought that she should be able to at least play a druggie – WRONG!!

Please! Emerdale Producers! GET RID OF HER!!! SHE IS USELESS!!!

Anyway, she has run away from the Barton’s house – lets hope it’s for quite a while and she comes back but as a different actor!

One can only hope!

Katie Price (Jordan) – The Case of One Serious Fame Wh*re

I was looking on the internet for the exact meaning of the phrase ‘Fame Wh*re’ but wasn’t able to find anything precise.

Quack quack Jordan, Quack Quack
Quack Quack Jordan, Quack Quack

From the sound of it it seems quite fitting when talking about Katie Price. In fact using both words independently also works – very handy indeed!

In the past I didn’t mind Katie Price and Peter Andre with their ‘kooky’ antics, and in fact I used to stay up just to watch ‘Katie & Peter: The Next Chapter Stateside’ for a little light hearted giggle. The problem I have now is that after their already heavily publicised break-up Katie just doesn’t seem to go away. It’s like a old school friend whom you never quite new but didn’t mind too much suddenly appearing and wanting to be best friends! Yeah, it was fun when we were 10 but please, life goes on! At the moment she is so embarrassingly desperate to get people to read some trashy mag about her version of the events that led up to their relationship break down that she is reverting to her old tactics of fandangled sleaziness! Can anyone honestly take her seriously when she drapes herself with letters from her supposed fans and with a deep seductive voice to entice the viewer to buy the mag? Can anyone give a fat arse? Jordan, you are being pathetic!

Sigh! That is the reason for my little vent!

I have a list of celebrities that I find nauseously annoying. Well, it’s not an actual list, more of a mental note – I don’t want you to think that I am obsessive. Of course Victoria Beckham and Heather Mills are up the top. Now, I’m sorry to say Katie, you and your perma-tanned face has shot up from an almost insignificant mosquito buzzing annoying to Pat Ferrari from that Sally Raphaël talk show annoying – who is one anusly annoying wench I might add!

Unfortunately, I don’t think that Katie will get the hint that all products have a used-by-date. She may have found it easy to show some silicon cleavage in the past for a bit of coin but like all plastic-wrapped chickens they only have a very short shelf life. Sad? Perhaps, but this chick is destined for the bin and lets all hope for the sake of our sanity it is sooner than later!


Bad Voices, Bad Arrangements, Bad Harmonies, Bad Lashes

Here we go again. Four desperate girls who obviously took to heart when their tonedeaf grandmothers told them that they have such amazing voices, are trying to create the next girl group sensation! The groups name? Bad Lashes. Urgh!

To give you a bit of a background.

Bad Lashes were a contestant on Britain’s X Factor 2008 and sung an acappella version of Crazy by Gnarls Barkley for their initial audition. Although completely murdering this great song by over ambitious and badly arranged harmonies they made it through with 1 No and 2 Yes’s.

Throughout X Factor’s filtering process it continued to be apparent that these ‘Hairdressers Trying to be a Girlband’ were completely out of their depth and was very painful to watch – like an uncle making rude jokes at a christening. They have no understanding about creating anticipation with their harmonies and was as though each one of them were competing on being the loudest with their vocal masturbation.

I shouldn’t say that they have bad voices as I’m sure that with some coaching that they one day may sound ok. But for the moment I suggest that they keep quiet, get some lessons, change their name and apply for a job singing old classics at the local old people’s home.

Top Gear or Top Geraniums?

What is happening with trying to feminize everything now-a-days? Dr Louise Livesey is a complete moron if she believes that by trying to change such a brilliant show to become more feminine she will win any respect from the everyday laymen or from her peers. What is she thinking?

Basically the Equality Bill was passed in the UK which encourages employers to take action to widen diversity in the public sector.

Top Gear, as do a number of other programs,  falls under this Bill as it is owned by the BBC – a publicly owned entity.

So it appears that Drrr Louise Livesey, a tutor in sociology and women’s studies at Ruskin College in Oxford, thought that this would be a good opportunity to jump on the ‘sexist bandwagon’ and said of the show that it was “entrenched with institutional sexism”.

Ahem.. I am sure we would all agree that most of the programs on TV are focused towards the fairer of the sexes, and if you feel different then I would like to propose a challenge by asking you to get today’s, or any days, television program and have a look.

It was claimed that, not only are the 3 hosts all male, the show had a ‘boys club’ production team and more male guests than female.

Andy Wilwan, Top Gear’s executive producer claimed that it was “utter drivel that the show excluded women, and asked if it was geared so harshly towards men then why is the audience almost half women?”

He continues by saying, “Secondly, if we are to have a female presenter just to represent the sexes, then by that logic Loose Women needs a bloke in the line-up pretty sharpish.”

“I actually believe these sorts of mandates are patronising to women viewers, because they assume that women can’t enjoy a show’s presenters on merit, but can only appreciate a program if spoken to by one of their own sex.”

If Top Gear is change then I know for sure that it will lose a majority of the viewers. Not just the male viewers but the female as people love the show as it is.

The Worst Movies of All Time

After watching Speed 2 I thought I would start a list of what I consider The Worst Movies of All Time! This list will no doubt get longer but it’s a good start I believe.

Feel free to let me know of others.

1. Speed 2 – Directed by Jan de Bont. Starring: Sandra Bullock and Jason Patric
How can a movie about high jacked cruise liner earn the title ‘speed’? Anyway, Sandra Bullock stars using her trademark ‘5yo babbling’ acting method. Please Sandra Bullock – cute talk is quite nice just before a bit of nooky, but when it’s stretched over a 1.5hr period it becomes well.. really really annoying! ARGH!

2. Basic Instinct 2 – Directed by Michael Caton-Jones. Starring: Stan Collymore and Sharon Stone
Watery scripting, watery acting. Sharon Stone, known more for her ‘spread eagle’ scene in the original Basic Instinct then her acting abilities, tries desperately to convince the viewer that she a twisted, dark, novel writer but instead comes across as someone suffering the after effects of a bad curry.

FHM’s World’s Most Sexist Women 2009 – Surely the list is upside down!

As the title says! How on earth can this years FHM’s World’s Most Sexist Women be taken seriously! I do agree with Megan Fox and Jessica Alba being in the top 3, but to be beaten by ahem Cheryl Cole that is nigh insulting! Surely there must be a conspiracy! And Britney Spears? Why is she on the list at all?

1. Cheryl Cole
2. Megan Fox
3. Jessica Alba
4. Britney Spears
5. Keeley Hazell
6. Adriana Lima
7. Elisha Cuthbert
8. Kristin Kreuk
9. Anna Friel
10. Freida Pinto

A Doggie Dilemma – Ellen DeGeneres

Ok, the story goes like this. Iggy, a cute little black Brussels-Griffon is lonely and needs a home. Ellen DeGEneres sees the dog, falls in love, then decides to adopt Iggy from the non-profit org that finds dogs a home. Iggy is not accepted with the local posse (aka the cats) that rules Ellen’s haunt. Ellen decides to give Iggy, whom she loves, to a trusted friend and her children who falls in love with Iggy just as Ellen did. Everyone’s happy right? Well not everyone. The non-profit organization by the name of Mutts and Moms is not happy that they were not involved with Iggy’s change of home, ego is hurt, they take Iggy back, cage him up, and now are looking for a home for this poor little dog.


Mutts and Moms, whose sole purpose is to find dogs a home that will love and look after them, takes back the darn little thing from a home that loves and looks after him to then find a home that will love and look after him. (Dizzy Spell). Who decided to give the boss of this company a job? Surely a Toy Doll Assembly line would have been more appropriate. They are going against the very reason why that organization exists? Am I missing something?

They are claiming that Ellen breached the contract that she signed stating that if the adoption doesn’t work out then she should take the dog back to Mutt’s and Moms and they will find a more suitable home. But surely the end in this case justifies the means. Don’t you think? For this small non-profit org surely Ellen did them a favor in finding a suitable loving home for Iggy and that all that was needed was a few documents to be signed and then life goes on. Also, it’s hardly intelligent of the organization to cause such a fuss with someone so famous. Look, I am into everyone being treated equally and that includes celebrities. But surely the co-owners of Mutts and Moms, Batkis and Venessa Chekroun, could have seized the opportunity to help promote their organization, as they are non-profit that I’m sure has a very tight budget. But instead they do something that goes against all logic and it is now known as a small organization with a similar sized ego that is so easily bruised.

Now Batkis Chekroun is now receiving threatening emails/letters including some ‘death threats’. I’m not condoning any of this, but well what did they expect? Ellen is known for being quite a soft hearted lady with her own talk show that is doing extremely well. As Ellen tends to wear her heart on her sleeve, she started to talk about the situation on her talk show, amongst a lot of tears. This would have won the hearts of even more viewers. It doesn’t take the intelligence of nuclear physicist to know that it would not be a good idea to ‘upset’ such a person. Not to say that Ellen was using her program as a stage to maliciously attack the company that upset her, as I don’t believe that that’s in her nature. But having said all that, it has definitely hit a soft spot of the American public which have now reacted in this way.

This could have all been avoided if they had just thought it through, if they had thought about why they had started their organization in the first place and made the appropriate amendments. Even if it was not according to protocol.

At the end of the day, poor Iggy is still lonely and is looking for a home that will love and look after him.

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