Author Posts

October 2, 2012 at 7:23 pm

I got trapped in love. The one thing I wanted to avoid and against my better judgment I let myself fall. And it was wonderful. The beginning was amazing. I understood why people went all googly eyed over this kind of shit. I lost my v-card to him, we exchanged I love you's. Yes, in that order. Things got serious. In the midst of all this mushy gushy crap, I lost something very important to me. Several things in fact. My friends. And myself. See, we started the beginning of my senior year. The time when we all had to make decisions on what we are gonna do with the rest of our lives. unfortunately I was blinded by shiny new love and neglected many things for it. In the process, I neglected friends and they went away. But still I stayed with him because I was happy. But its been a year and a half and suddenly I feel…sad. Again. This wouldn't be such a big deal, the normal me would just drop him. But now, he's all i've got. I am so lonely. and as a double Libra this ain't cool. I remember a me that was strong and happy and motivated. Now I am none of those things. I want to make a life for myself, I want to be the one that shocks the world. I want it all and I find myself stuck. I don't want to leave him. I'm afraid of what i'll be without him. All I know is that I don't like who I am. And I fear if I don't figure this out soon. I'll be stick forever. I'm only 19. To quote JRB, I will not be the girl stuck at home in the burbs with the baby the dog and the garden of herbs, I will not be the girl in the sensible shoes pushing burgers and beernuts and missing the clues, I will not be the girl who gets asked how it feels to be trodding along at the genius' heels, I will not be the girl who requires a man to get by.

 

 

 

 

October 19, 2012 at 1:06 pm

I'm in the same boat. im 18 and been with this guy for a yr and a half. i lost friends and he's the only one i talk to. I want to leave him becus i want to be stronger and not need anyone and he doesn't have much goin on. i want a better future but everytime i try to break up with him , i can't. i will also be alone. its good to know im not the only one. if you think of a solution let me know. i want to get out of this situation.

January 3, 2013 at 5:49 pm

I met this guy at church camp. He is literally the nicest guy I know and he became a wonderful friend. Over the course of about 6 months we started to like eachother. All the while he had a girlfriend that he has been dating for 3 years. I knew he had one, but I just kept telling myself that it was okay. We never did anything other than hug, I swear. But I'm the type of person that is always there for someone. And he was always there for me. And I really liked that. So when the time came to hang out or whatever I was just so head over heals I totally forgot about his girlfriend. He was telling me that he was thinking about breaking up with her. Which I was very happy about because I really really like him. But he didn't. Surprise Surprise. Last night I told him that we could no longer be friends because I was constantly being treated like a second option, when I put him first. He had a lot of things he needed to figure out himself. So I thought what I was doing was the right thing. After a long conversation full of crying and “I don't want this to happen”'s (on both ends) I ended our relationship. Now I just miss him like crazy. I hate being alone. I hate that I cant talk to him anymore, he was like my bestfriend and I really hate that he's not here anymore. I want to text him so bad and tell him that I miss him and we can keep ignoring that he has a girlfriend. But I can't. Because every single time I see her post something on facebook about him it literally kills me. I want him to be mine, not hers. And I knew this would happen, but I didn't care at the time because I was happy. I am so tired of feeling alone. I am always there for everyone but no one is ever there for me. I just wanna cry all the time because how sad I am. I'm just so done. I'm so confused. FML.ConfusedCryEmbarassedFrownYell