Author Posts

May 29, 2015 at 6:55 pm

I honestly need to get all of this off my chest. My boyfriend and I had been planning on moving in together but we were going to wait until the end of this year to the beginning of next year. When we were discussing the city/town we should move to, we both had agreed upon either one of these two towns that are right next to the community college that we both attend. This was a decision that we had both made together and it was one that I thought we were going to stick by. Skip ahead a month or so and it will bring you to today. Today he mentioned to me that both he and his friend were talking about the three of us moving in together. When I asked exactly where they were talking about moving to, my boyfriend mentioned cities in Tennessee that I have never heard of before and even mentioned Chattanooga. This is in a completely different state than the one I am in now. He didn’t even ask me if it would be okay. He didn’t even include me in talking about the places where we could possibly move. I’m still not close to graduating from my college and I have a stable job near where I live now. He told me that they were leaning toward a town in Tennessee near where his friend lives now because there ‘is not much keeping us here’. Which is utter crap. While he may not have anything that is holding him down here, I have several things anchoring me in my place. All of my family live here as well as the only two friends that have stuck by my side. My boyfriend has friends as well. But the difference between my friendships and his is that his friendships are solely kept online while my two friendships have sprouted from real life. He can uproot himself from the home he lives in now and can move across the country if he chooses and it would be like he didn’t even move because he would still be chatting online with his friends like he does now. The friend he is considering moving in with is one of those online friends. If I were to move to another state, I would be leaving everything behind. Friends, family and my job. He would have a friend to turn to and hang out with on a daily basis but I would feel alone without a friend to see every once in a while. He even mentioned that he knew I would be leaving my friends behind. He says he hates living here and that there is absolutely nothing here and there is nothing keeping him here. He said he is serious about moving in with him. Is it selfish of me to want to stay in this state? Is it selfish of me to be terrified of moving to an unknown location without knowing a single soul in that area? I have made so many sacrifices for him in my life as it is. I lost one of my friends because he couldn’t stand her and didn’t want her to be in my life anymore. Why can’t he step up and make one little sacrifice for me? I don’t ask for much. All I want is to at least stay in this state. We could move to whatever city he wants in this state and I would be okay. I’m just so terrified that he’s going to guilt trip me into this like he always does. I’m going to give in to his wants and I’ll end up not being happy. He had told his friend that I said I was thinking about it because of my family and my job. I eventually just said fuck it and let him have his way. I told him that I was sorry for being ‘selfish’ and that I would just move to another state to make things easier on him and his friend. He then told his friend that I changed my mind and that I would be moving to Tennessee as planned. I shouldn’t have been the one to apologize for being selfish.

June 11, 2015 at 12:41 pm


You don’t need that bullshit. Ever. Do not sacrifice all of the things you hold dear for a boy. Don’t do it. Don’t do it. Don’t do it. You’ll regret and you’ll become dependent on him. Get out and get out now.