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    Arc posted an update 1 day, 11 hours ago

    July 16th 2019: Well goddamn she’s back in my life again. 2 years ago I basically started this online diary because of her and now It has come back full circle. We’ve talked and talked and TALKED about our lives over these past 2 and a half years and we’ve grown and changed so much! I’m very nervous and hope that our changes have made us into the…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Continuation of last post(same day): Eh never mind I don’t think om ready for those thoughts to leave my head just yet. Theres just so many, I don’t know where to start and I’d rather do this without tripping over myself even if it’s just writing .

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    Arc posted an update 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    May 26th, 2019: I would really enjoy female attention and the fact of not having a girlfriend is kind of eating at me. A few days ago dad made a comment/joke that wore me down the next day at work. It went in tandem with me not having a girlfriend and not really seeking female attention and it just wore me down. At work that day I felt as if I’ll…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 3 months, 1 week ago

    April 8th, 2019: I feel like my life is a constant cycle of wanting so badly to be out of one chapter in my life; only for me to constantly reminisce and want to go back once I am out of that chapter and in the new one I wanted to be in. I feel like I’m being left being, that what it is I have this constant feeling as if I’m being left behind by…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 3 months, 2 weeks ago

    April 1st/ 2nd, 2019 (it’s 11:58 by the time i finish it’ll be after 12:00 AM) I’ve been procrastinating for weeks on making an entry but I just never got around to it until now. Now feels like as good time though. So lets just put it all out there: I engaged in a sexual act, I’m now 20, My FTS is gone, and she texted me about Jordan being in a…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 5 months, 1 week ago

    Last post ↓ date: February 5th, 2019

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    Arc posted an update 5 months, 1 week ago

    That bad day I had days back really helped me out. I was just not with it that day and it felt like negativity just kept coming my way and I had no explanation for it. Now for the upside it made me realize that some days are just like that for no good reason and that’s OK. I don’t need to be happy-go-lucky positive all the time. As long as my…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 6 months ago

    Note to self: Continue to date your posts!!!

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    Arc posted an update 6 months ago

    January 18th, 2019: I haven’t been on here (well, really on here) in a bit. I have a paper diary that I’ve been writing in for the past few months and even then I haven’t kept up with it much either lol. Anyways I’m doing fine right now, I really am I feel pretty good most of the time and I think I’m finally just happy coasting. Life is good right…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 6 months, 2 weeks ago

    still last minute!!!!! just, good luck in 2019 Malik continue doing what you’re doing. Continue growing!!!
    -Malik 2018

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    Arc posted an update 8 months, 3 weeks ago

    October 23rd, 2018: I’m in a position where I’m just coasting I’m not getting sadder, but I’m not getting happier. This the most frustrating feeling I have ever felt In my life, like…….(sigh). I feel like I’d be different If I was happier in this position; If I was “happy coasting”, But I’m not. I’m aware that this is a down in my life but UGH…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 8 months, 3 weeks ago

    Note to self: Don’t use names EVER again.

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    Arc posted an update 10 months, 1 week ago

    September 9th, 2018: I don’t understand what I’m feeling in right now, I just know it isn’t good. boredom, despondency, uninterest, annoyance, Negativity, loneliness, judgment. This does not feel good. What is the matter with me. 2 years ago I never would have imagined I’d ever feel this way. Big oof

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    Arc posted an update 11 months, 2 weeks ago

    Note to self: start dating your posts

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    Arc posted an update 11 months, 2 weeks ago

    This will be the first time I mention names on here. What the hell am I doing with Ambur? I feel wrong and that I’m setting myself up for failure, but I feel different because I want to try with her. I’ve never really gotten the chance to become true friends with her. But why now what made me decided now was the time to let her back in….. 🙁 is…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 1 year ago

    I’ve been graduated for just over a month now and i have to say, things are better, about the same amount of boring but still better. Being out of school really make it apparent just how much free time you have on your hands, but i don’t want to just sit around i actually want to and have gotten things done that contribute to my future, it feels…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 1 year, 2 months ago

    I need to rely on myself more often. I made a promise to myself and I let outside influence break it. And now I’m here…feeling even lower than before, giving myself the biggest I told you so ever. This hurts more than someone else saying it. I should have listened to MYSELF. And now their the ones happy and I’m here. Again ALL because I didn’t…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 1 year, 3 months ago

    I’ve been distracted….and today was the worst. I just didn’t want to anymore I didn’t want to do anything that in any way regarded school FUCK school. Different topic, trying not to think of the past only makes me think of the past has only made me think of it just as much. I’ve been distracted…..She hasn’t occupied my full thoughts lately and…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 1 year, 3 months ago

    Perhaps I dwell on the absolute past because, I’m looking at an uncertain future, filled with hopes and dreams that may not be attainable, or likely to happen. The past is certain, the present is meh, and the future is uncertain. I know in the past at different points i was certainly happy, the present is dull and partially bleak, and the future…[Read more]

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    Arc posted an update 1 year, 4 months ago

    I’ve been reminiscing about the past a lot today specifically about her…them…the Ex’s that mattered. I suppose this has a link to her today, and what she does….it resembles them. But she’s different, she’s not mad, she doesn’t make excuses for why she can be sad, she tries her absolute best to put a smile on her face ALL BY HERSELF. And…[Read more]

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